Should We Get Married Or Wait?

Q. I have read a lot in your page about the provision of God and of the principle of looking for the Kingdom of God first and the rest would be added. My concern is the following: My boyfriend and I have decided to marry next year; however we do not yet have the necessary funds to supply our elementary needs. We received a prophecy that it would be in the time of the Lord and we believed it, but I am disturbed by the idea that by our own strength we could be ahead of the plan of God for our lives if we decide on specific date for marrying without having the economic resources at the present moment. Are we acting well or are we hastened by the fact that we want to form a home centered in Christ? We sincerely want to do the will of God. I am very grateful for your advice.

A. It sounds like you’re basing your decision to get married at a certain time at least partly on a prophecy you received. I believe it’s always a good idea to get independent confirmation of prophecies based on the Biblical admonition that things should be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses (Deut. 19:15, Matt. 18:16).

Also, I don’t think it’s ever a good idea to knowingly bring anything into a marriage that could cause undue strife. Marriages are difficult enough as it is, and financial struggles are a primary cause of strife.

I don’t think the Lord’s instruction that if you seek first his kingdom and His righteousness all your needs will be met (Matt. 6:31-34) should be used to justify taking on new financial burdens prematurely. The future is always uncertain, but the Lord was reassuring us that if we stay focused on Him, we won’t have to worry about what may lie ahead.

If you can’t reasonably project that you will be able to afford to get married by the date you’ve set, and haven’t received independent confirmation of the prophecy, then I would advise waiting until you are more certain.

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