Can’t We Just Sleep Together?

I am a 47 year-old divorced woman saved about a year ago. My boyfriend is 51, divorced and also a believer. We live in separate homes, but my boyfriend stays with me on the weekends. I insist that we can sleep together without sex and still please the Lord. My boyfriend disagrees and believes that the only solution is to get married.

Q. I am a 47 year-old divorced woman saved about a year ago. My boyfriend is 51, divorced and also a believer. We have not enjoyed the physical intimacy of a happy marriage relationship until we met two years ago. Ever since, we have been living a wonderful, loving and passionate relationship. However, we both love the Lord and want to be obedient to His Word.

We both feel torn between the desire of the flesh and being obedient; we don’t quite know how to go about it. We love each other deeply and want to stay together. We live in separate homes, but my boyfriend stays with me on the weekends. I insist that we can sleep together without sex and still please the Lord. My boyfriend disagrees and believes that the only solution is to get married, but we are not ready yet. What is your opinion?

A. The Bible says that sex outside of marriage is a sin. If you’re not ready for marriage then you’re not ready for a sexual relationship. Maybe your boyfriend is afraid of the temptation of sleeping together, or maybe he’s afraid that it will signal a bigger commitment than he’s ready for. Or maybe he just wants you to marry him first. In any case, I think you should respect his wishes, just as you would want him to respect yours if the situation was reversed.