Can’t We Just Sleep Together?

Q. I am a divorced woman who was saved about a year ago. My boyfriend is also a divorced believer. We have not enjoyed physical intimacy, but we do have a loving and passionate relationship. We both love the Lord and want to be obedient to His Word.

We feel torn between the desire of the flesh and being obedient and don’t know how to deal with it. We love each other deeply and want to stay together. We live in separate homes, but my boyfriend stays with me on the weekends. I insist that we can sleep together without sex and still please the Lord. My boyfriend disagrees. He thinks the only solution is to get married, but we are not ready yet. What is your opinion?

A. The Bible says that sex outside of marriage is a sin. If you’re not ready for marriage then you’re not ready for a sexual relationship. Maybe your boyfriend is afraid of the temptation that would come from sleeping together, or maybe he just wants you to marry him first. In any case, I think you should respect his wishes, just as you would want him to respect yours if the situation was reversed.

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