Q. Some time ago our son died after a long illness. This was the hardest thing I have ever been through. I felt so abandoned by God that for months I lashed out and I even called him names and vowed to become an atheist.
I am finally starting to deal with my son’s death and I also feel so ashamed that I lashed out at my Lord, and turning on him the way I did. I’m afraid he could never forgive me for such an act. Every day I try to get closer to Him again. Can I be forgiven for the way I acted toward him? I need to know because it is a tormenting feeling to be separated from God.
A. It’s important to remember that God knows the end from the beginning, so your reaction to your son’s death was not a surprise to Him. And since He knew all this before He agreed to save you, He had already forgiven you and neither this nor anything else you can do will cause him to change His mind. There are several Scripture passages that confirm this.
In John 10:27-30, Jesus said, “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.”
Paul confirmed this in Romans 8:38-39. “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
The above verses show that you’ve remained saved throughout this ordeal. To restore your relationship with God, confess your sin of anger and you’ll immediately be forgiven. It will be like it never happened.
1 John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
When we draw near to God, He will draw near to us (James 4:8). We have His Word on that.