I would like to know the meaning of the man as head of household, and should a wife do whatever the husband tells her if he’s not faithful to God, drinks obsessively, has integrity issues, and squanders money?
In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul described the marital relationship as it should be. Wives are to submit to their husbands in everything just as if they were doing it for the Lord. Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church, overlooking all their faults and placing their wives’ needs ahead of their own, even to the point of giving their very lives for the well-being of their wives. (Ephes. 5:22-27)
In this way, the marriage becomes a model of Christ and the Church. When one party fails to uphold his part of the bargain, in your case your husband, the model falls apart and it becomes very difficult for the other party, you. But the solution is not to cease doing your part. Remember you’re doing this for the Lord, not for your husband. If he’s not mature or responsible enough to do his part, then he’s in trouble with the Lord and the Lord will deal with him accordingly. As for you, remaining faithful to your obligations will please the Lord and he’ll bless you for it. In most cases, He does this by bringing the errant husband to task.
Of course, all this assumes that you’re both believers and your husband is 100% of the problem. Ask the Lord if any part of the responsibility lies with you, and if so make sure you address any issue He brings to your mind.