Q. My mother had a 13 year affair with my husband. Needless to say my marriage was over. My Daddy would not believe she did anything wrong, because that is what she told him. He had a nervous break down and died young of heart problems.
Mother was telling me she had done nothing wrong and would not admit to the truth. I called our pastor to come to her house so she could tell him what she had been telling us. She told him “I have done nothing wrong.” He asked, “Her to explain to him how she could commit adultery and not feel bad about it.” She replied, “On my way to meet him I asked God to forgive me. Afterward I would repent for what I had done wrong, so I have not committed any sin.” The pastor, told her that if she believed she had not done anything wrong she had been turned over to a reprobate mind. She started crying and saying, “there is no hope for me.”
She has had an affair with one of the pastors of the local church, with one of the deacons and then again with another family member and this is what we know of. She has never show any remorse, it has been just as if “Oh well.” I am so wanting to find some kind of fruit of repentance. She is in her late 70’s and is conniving and deceptive, lies is just mean to her daughters and causes confusion.
Question: Can you give me any hope?
A. 1 John 1:9 says that if we confess our sins, God is just and faithful to forgive us and will purify us from all unrighteousness. It doesn’t place any limit on how many times He’ll do this. We need to understand that God knew every sin of our life before we were born and took them all to the cross. When we are born again all of them are forgiven. Every one. The Pastor’s comment to your mother didn’t take into consideration her admission that she knew she was sinning because she asked the Lord’s forgiveness before and after each occurrence. If she was truly born again then she was forgiven each time she asked, and therefore the Lord saw her as if she hadn’t sinned.
From a human point of view, the things your mother has done are reprehensible and make it it appear that she couldn’t be saved, but that’s why God told us to leave those things to Him. (1 Cor. 4:5) We can not discern the motives of another’s heart. Only He can do that. Our job is to forgive others as we’ve been forgiven.