I am hoping that you can help me to better understand a wife being submissive to her husband. I have been a Christian for 10 years now, but have never really gotten my brain wrapped around this particular truth. I have been married for 21 years, and to be really honest, am not sure of my husbands salvation. I want to honor the Lord in my marriage, and be honorable to my husband. Your input would be greatly appreciated.
The clearest model we have for this is Ephesians 5:22-28. Wives are supposed to submit to their husbands as the Church submits to the Lord (Ephes. 5:22-24). The Church seeks the Lord’s will in everything and follows His direction. So should a wife submit to her husband, seeking his will and direction for their lives.
The husband’s part is to love his wife as the Lord loves the Church (Ephes. 5:25-28). The Lord gave Himself up as an expression of His love for the Church, putting aside everything He was in order to elevate Her. He sees her as perfect, without any defect or shortcoming. This is the way a husband should regard his wife.
Both parties have to be committed to this ideal, but when a wife submits to her husband’s will and His will is to devote his life to loving her, everybody wins. And that’s what the Lord desires for us.